Dealing with Rejection
In a recent article about dating, I gave advice about approaching your crush and letting them know how you feel. There’s never anything wrong with doing that and it’s usually better to let the person know how you feel than bottle it in, right? But what happens when you approach your crush and they tell you that they don’t feel the same way? Here's a bit advice for dealing with the rejection Choma.
Acknowledge how you feel
When the feeling of rejection is new and still raw, it’s hard to simply snap out of and that is perfectly understandable. It’s okay to go through the emotions and to feel down about being rejected because anyone in your position would feel the same. It’s okay to acknowledge that you're sad about what happened. You're human Choma.
Remind yourself that the feeling will pass
You’re not going to feel this way forever Choma. It will hurt now, but with time you will slowly start to realize that you can’t dwell on these feelings of rejection for too long. Going through something and telling yourself that these feelings will pass won’t make you feel better instantly, but it might make you feel encouraged to get over it in less time. Be gentle with yourself Choma, the hurt will pass.
Speak to someone about it
You’ll be surprised how much better you feel after you’ve expressed your feelings out loud to someone else. Talk to your friend, parent or family member about what happened and about how you feel. The might be able to offer you advice or support and help you see the situation differently. You might even end up laughing about it together.
Don’t dwell on the rejection
As much as you should acknowledge your feelings and allow yourself to go through them, don’t dwell on this for too long Choma. You might be tempted to try and figure out why the person doesn't feel the same way, what it is they want that you don’t have or how you can change yourself to suit them - but it’s simply not worth it. They could have their own reasons for not wanting the relationship. Maybe they are not ready for one or maybe they don't think the two of you are a good match. That’s fine Choma - when the time comes, you will find someone who is the right match for you.
Focus on the positives and on what makes you great. Someone rejecting you doesn’t take away how amazing you are - it just means that they are not the right person for you. Don’t give up on meeting other people and spending more time with people who appreciate how great you are. When the right person comes along you’ll wonder why you were ever sad about the rejection in the first place.
Remember, if you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).
Did you find this article helpful? Yes No