#DoneWithSilence: Tivania Moodley: My story
The #DoneWithSilence campaign is a campaign Choma launched in June. Since the launch of the campaign, we’ve seen many people come forward with what they are done being silent about. One powerful voice that has come forward with her story, is author and motivational speaker, Tivania Moodley. Here is her story.
*Remember, if you want to create your own #DoneWithSilence post, you can create a post on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Just tag @chomamag and use the hashtag #DoneWithSilence
My name is Tivania Moodley and I am the author of Girl on Fire, an editor by profession and an influencer and motivational speaker on the side. I was so excited to play a role in the #DoneWithSilence campaign because I know the impact that words can have. I know the importance of being able to speak my truth, because I suffered for too many years in silence, until eventually my silence caused me to try and commit suicide five years ago. I survived – by some miracle – and now, my voice will never be silenced again.
I think it is so important as women, to be able to honour ourselves for who we are. We are suffering under the pressure of culture, tradition and ‘rules’ that force us to be a certain way. This kind of pressure is suffocating, and more especially, it kills our spirit.
For me personally, from the time I was 11 years old, I just never fitted in. I was never the pretty girl, or the most-intelligent, or the most-popular and I was terrible at sport. In terms of my appearance, I was darker than most Indian girls. In the Indian community, colour-prejudice was a big thing growing up. You were only pretty if you were light-skinned. To add to that list, I was terribly thin, almost skeletal, and really tall. This put me in the firing line for teasing and insults throughout my entire schooling experience. It was the worst time of my life.
Moving into adulthood, nothing changed. Even though I fleshed-out, after having a child, and pregnancy hormones changed my skin colour, I was still very much the isolated, sad and withdrawn girl that I was in school.
Now, I was faced with the challenge of being a single mum on top of everything else. And my depression and self-hatred just got worse. I have only started learning how to love myself in the last five years – a process that has taken time and patience, and required a ton of courage to be able to accept who I am fully, without focusing on what anyone else thought of me. Now, my intention is to share my experiences with the world, to embrace who I am, and to empower other women to do the same.
I look forward to sharing my story with you in the coming weeks and having you share a bit of your story with me (feel free to comment below).
Together, we can all be #DoneWithSilence.
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