Breakups can be very tough to handle by both men and women and they can bring so many emotions like confusion, rejection and heartache especially if you still have feelings for your ex. All these emotions are a normal reaction to the end of the relationship even if things ended in a healthy way.

Everyone is left with processing why the relationship ended, and this often leads to going through the stages of grief. While there is no magical cure to heal a broken heart, there are plenty of healthy ways to help you to move on and these are some:

Try To Keep Your Distance from Your Ex.

Even if you and your ex have decided to stay friends or be in communication, this can have negative effects as you might find yourself wanting to go back. Rather move away completely from each other right after the breakup. This means not seeing each other, not being around each other’s circle and not calling or texting each other. You don’t have to stop talking altogether, but you do need to cut all communication for as long as it takes to get completely over them.

Know That The Pain You Are Feeling Is Normal.

After a breakup, it is normal to feel sad, angry, confused and have other emotions. You might worry that you will end up alone or that you won’t find love again. Just remind yourself that it is normal to feel this way and that you need to feel these emotions to move on.

Remove Painful Memory Triggers.

There are different kinds of things that can remind you of your ex like a song, a smell, a clothing item, or a certain place. These things can make it harder for you to recover from the breakup. It can be beneficial to clear your space from all these triggers so you can focus on your healing.

Allow Yourself To Grieve The Loss Of The Relationship.

The end of a relationship can leave a big hole in your heart, which may require a significant period of time to grieve. Make sure that you give yourself time and permission to grieve this loss and experience the pain it comes with. If you feel like crying, screaming or whatever you need to do to get your emotions out. Do it.

Get Out And Do Things.

When a relationship ends, it is okay to have some time to yourself at home. Also consider getting back out there after processing your feelings. Make plans, go out with your friends, and have fun. At first it might seem awkward, but it will get easier with time, and it will help you to feel better. You don’t need to go out with people all the time, you can also do solo dates.

Getting out and doing things helps you grow and maintain your social network after the breakup, this will help you to move on with your life.

Beware Of Rebound Relationships.

Often people will quickly enter a new relationship after a breakup; this type of relationship is called a rebound relationship, where you want to quickly replace your ex. Getting a rebound is common, but it is not always a good idea because you may be hiding your emotions with the excitement of the new relationship. Consider remaining single until you have fully processed your emotions and gotten over the breakup.

Remember Chomas, recovering from a breakup takes time but try to remember that things will get better as time goes on. In the meantime, be gentle with yourself and don’t hesitate to reach out if you need support.

If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, , an  Instagram message , a  Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).