If you’ve recently broken up with someone, it can be tempting to go back into the dating scene. But is there a specific amount of time one should wait before moving on? While there’s no specific formula for figuring out how long you should wait, most people generally need some time to bounce back after a breakup. Other’s may need a couple of months and if you need more time, that’s ok, everyone is different.

Taking a break from dating after a breakup isn’t just about nursing your feelings, it’s also about figuring out what you’ve learned from the relationship so that you can carry it over to the next one. Everyone is different and there is no need to rush into anything when you are not ready. These are some ways you can see you are ready to move on or not:

Assess whether you feel excited about dating again.

Meeting a new person after a breakup can be quite tricky, but you must ask yourself if you are moving on to avoid feelings of pain or want to pursue a relationship with this person. Check in with your emotions and physical reactions and if you’re really into the idea, then it can be a sign that you are ready.

Ask yourself if you still have feelings for your ex

After a breakup, you’ll probably still have a lot of feelings for your ex for a while. If you still feel sad, angry, or hurt whenever you think about them, you might need a little more time to figure things out. Once you start thinking about them and feel like you have completely accepted what happened, that’s a sign that you may be ready to move on. On the other hand, when you find a new potential partner, assess whether you find yourself comparing them to your ex. If you are not confident about how you feel about them, it is a sign that you are not ready to move on.

Assess your reasons for wanting to date again.

Dating someone because you enjoy their company is one of the best ways to show you that you’re ready. You might also be ready to start dating again if you’re excited about the idea of meeting and socializing with new people. On the other hand, you may need more time if your reasons for dating again are because you want to re-live your last relationship, feeling lonely and trying to fill the void, or you want to make your ex jealous. This shows that you are not ready.

Ask yourself if you feel self-confident.

 Usually after a breakup you may feel down, have less confidence, and blame yourself for the breakup. If you are not feeling great about yourself right now, that is a sign that you are not ready to move on until you have dealt with these emotions. Before you go back into dating, take time to assess your self-image. The more confident and self-assured you are, the easier it will be to build a satisfying and a healthy relationship moving forward. Feeling good about yourself is one of the signs you’re ready to start dating again.

Remember to trust your instincts and do what feels right for you Chomas, you don’t need to put pressure on yourself.

If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, , an  Instagram message , a  Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).