Society has made women believe that they can’t openly enjoy sex in the same way that men are encouraged to. This has made it hard for women to have a fulfilling sex life without putting the needs of men before theirs, but this doesn’t have to be the case. You can have a more fulfilling sex life. Here’s how.

Do your research

To enjoy sex, you first need to understand it. Sex is about more than just penetration and it’s important to do your research about sex, sexuality, STIs and contraceptives. This way, you’ll know what your options are and be more open to exploring them. Speak to a doctor or nurse about these things so that you have a better understanding of how they work.

Prioritise your health

Your mental, physical and emotional health are really important in ensuring that you have a healthy and fulfilling sex life. Often people use sex to mask or ignore certain emotional issues that they have, which can only lead to more problems. Prioritising your health means making sure you’re dealing with issues and having sex for enjoyment, rather than to fill a void.

Connect with your partner emotionally

Intimacy and emotional connection can positively affect your sex life. Developing a safe and trusting relationship with your partner means that you’re more likely to be comfortable with them. Being comfortable with someone means that you can have difficult conversations around sexual health, boundaries, STIs and HIV. It also means that you’ll be able to communicate with them about using condoms and waiting to have sex when you are ready.

Communicate your desires

Your partner isn’t going to know what your needs and wants are if you don’t communicate them. Building healthy communication in your relationship means that both of you will be able to express your needs and explore your sexuality in a way that’s safe and respectful to each other’s boundaries.

Practice safe sex

Engaging in risky sexual behaviour, like having unprotected sex with multiple partners, can expose you to STIs  and unplanned pregnancy, which can make it difficult for you to enjoy sex. Using condoms, getting tested and screening for STIs helps you stay safe, knowing that your health is not at risk. This ensures that your experience of sex is free, relaxed and enjoyable.

Having a more fulfilling sex life is something that’s achievable if you follow the guidelines I’ve provided above. Remember, that when it comes to sex, you have every right to do things at your own pace, without feeling pressured or forced.

Remember if you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).