Let’s talk about something that not many people are willing to discuss: Pulling Out (i.e. when a guy removes his penis during sex just before he orgasms to avoid impregnating his partner).

Why people choose the pull-out method

Not a lot of girls are willing to admit that they use the pull-out method as a form of contraception, but when you really start talking to girls about their sex lives you realise that quite a lot of them do.

The pull-out method, a popular form of birth control because it doesn’t cost anything, can be used anytime and allows you to ditch the condom. Sounds simple, right? So then why are some people shocked when you admit to using the pull-out method? I’ll tell you why, because it’s a HUGE risk.

Why the pull-out method is a bad idea

The pull-out method does NOT protect you from contracting a sexually transmitted disease (STD) such as HIV, and just because he didn’t ejaculate doesn’t mean you can’t fall pregnant!

“I’ve used the pull-out method hundreds of times and I only fell pregnant once.”

I’ve heard women say this before. Think about it like this: You’re with your boyfriend, things get hot and heavy, but then you both realise that you don’t have a condom. The desire to have sex is so strong that he says “Don’t worry, I’ll pull out” and because you also want to be with him really badly, you agree. If your sexual desire is so strong that you can’t put off sex long enough to wait until you have a condom, what guarantee do you have that you will both be able to control your sexual desire DURING sex? What guarantee do you have that your boyfriend will be like “Oh, hold on, I should stop”, if he couldn’t say it before sex? Think about it, Choma.

“He really hates condoms guys, and I don’t want that to keep us from having sex.”

The whole ‘condoms don’t feel good’ excuse is a bit played out, let’s be honest. Some guys only say this because so many others do, as if it is something they are ‘supposed’ to say. We’ve grown up in a society where safe sex sounds like something only adults and teachers talk about to keep us from having sex. So condoms are seen as “uncool”

There’s nothing cool about having a baby, an STI or STD you’re not ready for. Yes, trust is a wonderful thing, but caution with trust is better because it keeps you SAFE.

If anything, using a condom is a good indication of responsibility and respect. When a guy agrees to use a condom he is saying “I respect my body and I respect yours.”

This is not meant to shame anyone for using the pull-out method; you are obviously trying to avoid pregnancy, which is understandable. But you really need to think about the risks involved. Safe sex is a lot more reassuring than simply hoping your partner will have enough self-control to successfully pull out every single time.

Remember if you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).