When our moms and their moms where younger, there was a lot of stigma attached to contraception, including the pill and condoms. As far as conservative people were concerned, only “loose women” used that kind of stuff. After all, you weren’t “supposed” to be having sex out of marriage, and if you were married and fell pregnant, that was to be seen as a good thing. Despite the judgement, many women – millions, honestly – continued to use contraception. There were a lot of reasons for this. Some were having sex before marriage, and some didn’t want children.

Contraception, as I’ve said before, choma, is considered an important step towards gender equality because it gives women more control over their own bodies. That’s an amazing thing, not a shameful one!

Fast-forward a couple of decades and there’s still some stigma floating around, unfortunately. Thankfully, it is quite easy to get and take the pill; it is small and discreet. But a girl with condoms is still on the receiving end of some serious side-eye from some people who should know better.

There are too many good reasons for you to take charge when it comes to contraception and protection from STIs, so don’t stop because someone might look at you funny.

Be Responsible

First off, if you are having sex, that’s your decision about your body. So then surely it is your responsibility to look after yourself too?

I’ve heard some women say that carrying condoms is a man’s job, but those men are not having sex by themselves. Don’t be a passive observer of your sexual relationship, choma. Be an active participant.

You can get free condoms from clinics, in some school or public bathrooms, and many other places. And you can buy them too from pharmacies, the big grocery stores and even behind the counter at most petrol station shops.

Be Firm

Sometimes men are resistant to wearing condoms because of the myths that go around about them. I’ve heard guys say “they can’t feel anything” with a condom on. That’s ridiculous! There’s a lot of research on this and there’s just nothing to back up men’s claims here. So, don’t be fooled by this claim, or the “I don’t have any” excuse. If you have condoms in your handbag or wallet, or wherever, then there’s no excuse not to use them. Again, your body = your rules.

Be Prepared

Ok, not all guys are trying to trick you when they say they don’t have any condoms with them. Some guys are just not very responsible. But if things are getting hot and heavy, and he’s forgotten to stock up, then you’ll be very glad you chose to carry condoms too. You will have your own supply close at hand, and you can enjoy consensual safe sex together, instead of hitting the brakes or taking your chances without protection.