Being in a relationship can be fun and exciting, you get to spend time with someone who gets you — and everything seems to be better when they are around. That doesn’t mean that your life should only be about your partner, you also have to live your own life apart from the relationship and here’s why.

You don’t want to lose yourself

If you make your life all about your bae, you will eventually start to forget who you were before the relationship. You may get so attached to your partner that you forget about all the things that you like, your dreams and your goals. While this may not seem like such a bad thing when you’re with someone whose interests you share, it can lead to feeling empty, restless and incomplete when they are not around. And if the relationship ends, it will be harder to heal since you may feel like you’ve lost a huge part of yourself along with the person.

Building a healthy relationship

It’s good to want to make time for bae and to look forward to spending time with them, but you need to have a balance of things that you do without your partner. Being in a healthy, mature relationship means that you and your partner have lives outside of the relationship. You need to be able to give each other space and respect each other’s boundaries so you don’t suffocate each other.

You don’t want to lose your friends

Being in love is a great feeling and it can make anyone want to spend all their time with their partner. However, we still need our friends for support and a good laugh, so you need to be careful not to neglect them once you are in a new relationship. Also, if things turn sour, you’ll need your circle of friends to help you through the tough times.

You might break up

There’s always a possibility that you and bae could break up (as hard as it may sound Choma) and you don’t want to have to start your life over from scratch if it happens. That’s why it’s important to maintain your friendships, hobbies and interests while you are in a relationship so that you can focus on these things to help you heal if the relationship ends.

Spending time with bae is important and necessary for the growth of the relationship, but you should know when to draw the line and not allow yourself to be totally consumed by your relationship. Remember that you had a life before bae and you should still have a life of your own even when you are in a relationship.

If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).