Relationships are an important part of our everyday lives and as humans, it’s normal to want to have a sense of belonging. Positive and healthy relationships help us feel good about ourselves and it’s important to be surrounded by people who make us feel like this. These are some ways to tell that you are in a healthy relationship.
The relationship:
- Makes you feel happy most of the time, not sad or stressed.
- Makes you feel safe and confident to be yourself.
- Both of you are equal. One person doesn’t have more power than the other.
- Is based on respect. You can talk about how you feel and have different views without leading to physical or verbal abuse.
- You are given the freedom to be yourself. You can decide what you want to do, who to see, where to go, and make your own decisions in life without being made to feel bad about it.
Some of the warning signs that indicate you are in an unhealthy relationship:
- The person tries to control you by telling you what you can and can’t do.
- They try to stop you from seeing your family and friends.
- They don’t respect your privacy, for example, checking your phone.
- They make you feel bad about yourself, for example, putting you down and blaming you for everything.
- They make you doubt yourself and your knowledge, beliefs, and values.
- They try to persuade you to do things you don’t want to do.
The Importance of Consent:
Consent is an ongoing mutual agreement between partners about what they want to do or not. Asking for and obtaining consent shows respect for yourself as well as your partner. It eliminates the entitlement that one partner may feel they have over the other. Neither your body nor your sexuality belongs to someone else. You have the right to say no to anything you do not want to do.
If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, an Instagram message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).