Being diagnosed with an STI while in a relationship can bring up a lot of uncertainty, and emotions. You may question your trust in your partner or feel ashamed if you’re the one who’s tested positive. What happens if you get diagnosed with STI, but your partner doesn’t have it?

Get more information

There are different types of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) Choma, and it might be a good idea to learn more about the one you have. The good news is that STIs can be managed with treatment. An untreated STI can have negative effects on your health and on your relationship. If you and your partner were intimate before you realized that either one of you had an STI, it’s important that you both get tested and start treatment immediately.

Talk to your partner about it

It’s important to do a self-introspection after being diagnosed with STI. This can be done by checking your sexual history. Ask yourself questions such as “who was the last person I had unprotected sex with”, “do I have multiple partners” or/and “do I trust my partner”?

Doing a self-introspection will give you a way forward to tell your partner about your diagnosis. Unfortunately, there’s no simple way of telling them you have STI. It’s always best to be honest and direct.

You can start by explaining to your partner how the visit at the clinic went, what the healthcare professional said and how you think you got it. Remember that as much as you want to hope for the best for your relationship, you should also prepare for some uncomfortable or painful emotions.

You know the kind of partner you have. If you feel scared of how your partner will react, you may want to consider not disclosing your diagnosis in private. Choose a safe or semi-public place instead. By doing so, if your partner reacts in a way that you’re not expecting, you won’t be putting yourself in danger. Remember not to tolerate violence or abuse in any way.

Reach a conclusion

Telling your partner about a STI could be a dealbreaker, and you should prepare yourself for this reality. It’s normal for them to feel confused, and they may need space to re-evaluate the relationship. Keep in mind that you’re not in control of how your partner will feel about you, after the fact. Allow them to feel whatever emotions they need to feel at that time, and give them space if they ask for it.

Remember that having multiple partners puts you at higher risk of contracting STIs. Consider narrowing down your sexual partners to one- in this way, you can have a healthier sexual life. Delay having sex up until you finish your treatment. Do a re-test to see if the treatment was effective. And lastly, always use a condom during sex to avoid contracting or spreading STIs, Choma.

If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).